I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
