we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
