Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
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