btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
