i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize