Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Acid is not a monday night drug
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
