walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
