Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
All I want is dick and wine.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
