We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
