The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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