sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize