Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
