Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
