Me too!
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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