Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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