Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
