Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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