Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
