i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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