I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
