Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
