you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
