is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Send help, water and tortillas.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
