Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
