I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
