and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
