are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
