The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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