community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
foreskin is a definite game changer
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
