bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Well I just put wine in my tea
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
