SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize