Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
