WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
