Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
