is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
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sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
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Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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