I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
