New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
