If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize