An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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