Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize