I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.