Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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