I heard we made out
If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
