So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
