Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
