Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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