Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
