yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
