wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
