That's intense
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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