there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
