there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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